Are you looking to influence behavior change in your child? Then you will want to put these three simple parenting tips into action. They’re a great way to create positive behavior change fast!
Simple Parenting Tips #1: Find a sparkling moment.
A sparkling moment is an exception to the rule. The first step to generating positive change in your child is to seek out sparkling moments. Exceptions to the rule happen all of the time. The problem is that we parents sometimes forget to reinforce them. Sparkling moments include times when our children:
- Go to bed on time.
- Eats their vegetables.
- Says “please,” and “thank you.”
- Runs over to give us a hug.
- Helps their brother or sister.
- Cleans up their toys.
Finding a sparking moment and highlighting it is an easy and quick parenting win!
Simple Parenting Tips #2: Ask the hero question.
The next step is to reinforce the positive behavior by asking the hero question, “How did you do that?” The hero question encourages your child to analyze success. You might state, “Wow! Your room looks great. How did you do that?”
If your child doesn’t know, help him form an answer. You might state, “It looks like you picked up one toy at a time until your room got clean.” The hero question does a couple of things:
- It reinforces that the positive result came about because of a positive choice.
- It helps your child to break the positive behavior into steps. If your child put these steps into action once, he or she can do it again.
- The time, attention, and focus on the positive action, are a strong reinforcer of positive behavior.
Simple Parenting Tips #3: Reinforce, reinforce, reinforce.
The final step is to reinforce positive behavior over and over again. This can be done through:
- Stickers on a sticker chart.
- Verbal praise.
- Taking a picture of the accomplishment.
- Bragging to your spouse about the job well-done, within earshot of your child (This is one of my favorite reinforcers).
[Tweet “Behavior therapy teaches us that when actions are noticed and reinforced, they happen more often. “]
Bonus Parenting Tips: Use shaping.
Shaping happens when parents reinforce the small steps on the way to the larger goal. Perhaps your child picks up a single toy–but doesn’t clean the whole room. If you lavish on the praise, then you are practicing shaping. Shaping rewards small steps on the way to a larger goal. And it’s an effective way to generate positive behavior change in a child.
Would you like to see positive changes in your child this week? Then put these positive parenting tips into action.
- Seek out the sparkling moments.
- Ask the hero question (How did you do that?).
- Reinforce, reinforce, and reinforce some more.
- Finally, use shaping to build momentum.
Proverbs 22:6 encouraged parents to train up their children in the way that they should go. These parenting tips are an excellent way to put this wise advice into action.
Continue the Positive Parenting Conversation
Dive deeper with these questions for reflection and discussion.
- Which of the positive parenting tips presented resonated with you the most?
- Have you used any of these positive parenting tips before? If so, how did the word for you?
- Which parenting idea will you implement first?
- What parenting tips or thoughts would you add?
We love hearing from you. Feel free to leave your parenting tips, tricks, and ideas in the comments below.
P.S. For more practical parenting tips from psychology and the Bible, be sure to check out my book, Coffee Shop Inspirations: Simple Strategies For Building Dynamic Leadership And Relationships. In this book, you’ll find five, practical parenting tips for leading well at home!